


Selena in the Snow

by GreenAppleGaming



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-09 02:19:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8871847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenAppleGaming/pseuds/GreenAppleGaming
Summary: Selena goes a bit too far when trying to find a gift to give Camilla for Krismas by stealing from a particularly special Anna. Now Selena has to repay her in the most humane way possible: by taking her place as the anonymous gift giver.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Decided to take a crack at writing a full-on fanfic for a Fire Emblem themed Christmas contest. It wasn't easy, but I sincerely hope that my efforts weren't in vain. Plus, I'd take any opportunity to make a hilarious mockery of Selena in some way, shape or form.

It’s the night before Krismas. The snow fell lightly down from the dimly lit skies of Nohr and onto the already whitely coated ground. Everyone, even seemingly the wildlife that inhabited the nearby forests, was asleep, waiting anxiously for the morning sun to rise so they could find whatever sorts of gifts are waiting under their trees. Well, there was one individual – a loud one, in particular – who was awake and just couldn’t stand to wait for Krismas morning. It was none other than Princess Camilla’s intense, aggressive and dedicated retainer, Selena, whose red hair was as bright as ever.

Selena was walking around the quiet city of Macarath. A city so famous for its bustling, bouncy civilians and businesses. It was almost eerie seeing the place in such a quiet, calm state. All the shops were closed and the houses were locked, and it was quite a long walk back to Castle Krakenburg. Selena was stuck there, in the cold, snowy outdoors, until morning.

“This stinks!” Selena said to herself, her voice turned bitter and anguished. “I didn’t get to do any shopping for Lady Camilla! I always get her a Krismas gift! Ugh, and now I have to stand out here all night and probably freeze to death!”

Selena walked up to a house and began to lean on the surrounding fence to think. Each year, Selena gave Camilla some form of present on Krismas day, whether it be something physical or something closer to the heart. This year, Selena had nothing physical to give her and she’d be lucky to survive the night with her heart still beating. The one gift, however, that Selena attempted to buy for Camilla this year was a small doll designed to look like Corrin, the Vallite Prince whom was also the adopted brother of Camilla. It seemed like the perfect gift. Camilla adores Corrin more than mostly anything on the face of the earth. Her having a pocket sized Corrin for Krismas seemed like a no-brainer to Selena. Unfortunately, every attempt to obtain this doll had led to several cuts, bruises and dislocated hips due to a stampede of rabid buyers who were also determined to get their hands on the doll. Each one of those failed attempts reminded her of Dusk Friday. Selena... didn’t want to be reminded of Dusk Friday.

“Well, one thing’s for sure, at least,” Selena spoke firmly to herself, “This night can’t POSSIBLY get any worse.”

Moments after saying this, the snow on top of the roof of the house collapsed to the ground below, right on top of Selena. Fortunately, Selena managed to climb out of the snow pile in mostly one piece. But now she was twice as cold as she was before, and, to make matters worse, her Nohrian army issued mercenary outfit had been completely soiled.

“Gah!! I hate this stupid snow!” Selena yelled to the heavens, scaring off a group of birds that landed on the roof shortly after the snow fell. It truly seemed like things were taking a turn for the worse for the ginger haired mercenary. She had no gift, no place to rest, and she had become a fashion disaster. However, just as things grew dim for Selena, a beacon of hope walked by – a red beacon, specifically – carrying a large sack of items. It was an Anna.

“Huh?” Selena thought to herself as she watched the mischievous red-haired merchant walk by. “Why’s an Anna trying to sell stuff on the night before Krismas? Sounds like a pretty stupid marketing trick.” With that thought in her head, Selena started to hatch an idea. It wasn’t gonna be a good idea, by all means, but Selena was rather desperate at this point. “Well, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if I tried to swipe just ONE thing from her...”

Selena took a shortcut behind several houses to try and get ahead of Anna. Whatever sorts of wares Anna was carrying in her bag, Selena was sure that at least one of them would make a sufficient gift for Camilla. As soon as she got well ahead of Anna, Selena hid in an alleyway, waiting for Anna to walk by. Once Anna was as close as possible to the alleyway, Selena stuck her leg out in an attempt to trip her. Sure enough, Anna fell for it. ...So to speak. Her leg connected with Selena’s and she released a loud yelp just before colliding with the ground. As soon as she did, Selena jumped out and tried to reach into her sack.

“Okay, yeah, this was probably a crappy thing to do, sure, but I need this!” Selena reminded herself as she tried to find the perfect item for Camilla inside the sack. However, it didn’t take long for the fallen merchant to get back on her feet and catch Selena in the act. Evidently, she wasn’t too happy to see the furious mercenary trying to steal her wares.

“Hey! What’s the big idea?” Anna said as she firmly pushed Selena away from the sack. “I don’t know if I should be flattered, but what gives you the right to trip me and then rob me?”

Selena also got onto her feet and tried to explain what happened; despite the fact that what Anna said she was doing was... pretty much exactly what Selena was doing.

“Look, I’m sorry that I tripped you, but I REALLY need a gift for Lady Camilla!” Selena plead. “I’ve been trying to buy this stupid doll for her all week, but I always get trampled by these losers and-“

“Ah-bup-bup!” Anna interrupted Selena as she was going on a rant. “A doll for Lady Camilla? The same Lady Camilla that lives in Castle Krakenburg, I assume?”

“Well, duh!” Selena responded. “I doubt there could be THAT many Lady Camillas in Nohr. Why do you ask?” Anna giggled to herself in a similar fashion to her other million sisters.

“Well, would that doll happen to be ooooooooof...” she said as she reached into the sack of mystery items. Much to the surprise of Selena, Anna pulled out the exact kind of doll that Selena had been looking for. A Corrin doll. Anna smiled cheekily as she looked at Selena’s furiously red face. “...Prince Corrin of Valla?”

“W-Where did you get that?!” Selena said, both confused and slightly peeved. “I thought all of them were sold out!”

“They are!” the red haired merchant announced “I just happen to have all the remaining ones that AREN’T on sale. I was going to give them away tonight, along with the rest of the toys in this sack. One hundred percent free!”

“Free?” Selena asked in full-on confusion. Did Anna even understand the meaning of the word “free”? “Ok, now I KNOW something’s up! You’re giving away toys for free on the night before Krismas? Doesn’t that kinda hurt your business?” Anna shook her head mockingly at Selena.

“Not at all! Because this ISN’T a part of my business.” she said to Selena. “Every night, on Krismas Eve, I go around Nohr and Hoshido and deliver presents to all the good guys and girls. We Annas have been doing this for over a thousand years. It’s kinda a grounded tradition at this point. Where do you think you got that squeaky pig pillow from?”

“That was you?” Selena asked, seemingly growing more interested in what Anna is saying.

“You bet! Were you expecting a fat guy in red clothes to be the one giving them away or something?” Anna said with evident pep in her voice. “Buuuuut, now I have a bit of a problem. Because a certain someone,“ she said, giving Selena a condescending stare, “decided to trip me during my delivery night, my leg feels pretty busted. I’m not gonna be able to finish my lap around both kingdoms in time for the morning.” Anna’s stare turns into a clever grin. “But I guess this wasn’t all too bad, because now you get to take my place, Nerd!”

“Huh? What are you talking about now? ...And what did you just call me?!” Selena said with growing fury.

“You get to be my replacement this year! After all, you’re the one responsible for this little accident. And besides, you already seem to have the look down.” responded Anna, teasingly. “Oh, and I called you ‘Nerd’ because that’s much easier to remember than ‘Selena’. So that’s what I’m gonna call you from now on!”

“Hmph. Okay, but what if I don’t wanna do it? Are you gonna cast a spell on me or something? Am I gonna get visited by three ghost that wanna eat me?” Selena said in retaliation, giving Anna a smug grin.

“Oh, that’s easy. I’m not gonna do anything. But if you think Lady Camilla not getting a Krismas gift tonight was gonna be a bummer, try and imagine both Nohr and Hoshido in their entirety without Krismas gifts.” menacingly spoke Anna. The thought of the sheer outrage that would follow was surprisingly enough to convince Selena.

“Ghh... Fine, I’ll do it!” reluctantly said the angry ginger.

“Good decision, Nerd!” Anna said as she claps her hands together. “I’ll be sure to monitor your performance all night, so don’t even think about taking any breaks!”

Selena turned around to evaluate the situation that she had gotten herself into. She had to go to every single house in both Nohr and Hoshido to deliver toys in Anna’s stead. It wasn’t going to be an easy task, but evidently, the universe didn’t really want her to win tonight. So Selena decided, against her better judgement, to try and suck it up and deal with it. However, there was one glaring question that Selena needed to have answered before beginning her long and trifling journey.

“Hey, hold on a sec... If your legs are busted, then how can you-“

As Selena turned back to face Anna, she discovered that the sneaky merchant has vanished.

“Ugh. Nevermind. I’ll get to work.”

The night was still young, but Selena’s mission wouldn’t be as swift as a snap of the fingers. She grabbed hold of Anna’s sack and began to travel to the nearest house. Upon examining the building, she recognized immediately whose house it was. It belonged to Peri. Upon realizing this, Selena took a gulp of worry. Peri wasn’t exactly one of the safest soldiers in the Nohrian army. She could only imagine what would happen if she got caught by Peri while trying to give her toys. Would she torture her? Cook her? Or would she just swiftly kill her? Either way, Selena knew that she just couldn’t get caught.

“Alright, Peri’s house...” she said to herself, “Seems easy enough. I’ll just walk on in and-“

Upon grabbing the door handle and attempting to open the door, Selena discovered that the door was locked – rather tightly, as well. She attempted to open the windows shortly afterwards, but they were locked, as well. Selena was baffled. She had no idea how to get into Peri’s house to deliver the toys. Eventually, Selena scanned the house and noticed a chimney – one that was just big enough to fit through – resting atop the house’s roof.

“...Anna SO owes me a free trip to the salon.” said the anger infused girl as she began climbing the walls of the house.

Selena retained her grip on the room’s shingles, despite the heavy amounts of snow covering it, and managed to pull herself up and reach the building’s chimney. The chimney was relatively wide and square – the perfect size for the titular (and somewhat rotund) redheaded mercenary to fit through. However, Selena couldn’t help but feel that something was not quite right. A strange smell filled the air - like burning wood.

“Ugh. Peri must be cooking something. Guess I’m just gonna have to be extra careful now.” remarked the sly mercenary moments before lifting her leg over the chimney and climbing into it. The weight of her body caused her to slide down the interior of the chimney and, much to her surprise and displeasure, a lit fireplace. She landed bottom-first onto the open flame and let out a loud scream in pain.

“GAAAAAHHHH!!!”

Selena leaped out of the fireplace and into the living room, patting her butt to reduce the scorching flames raging upon it. Once the fire had finally disappeared from Selena’s now crispy-black behind, she released a sigh of both frustration and relief.

“Okay, forget the salon.” she said with fury in her voice “That girl owes me a new pair of pants!”

Despite being on the verge of ranting, she began to hear the sounds of approaching footsteps. Each one grew louder and louder and sent a spark of anxiety up Selena’s back. It seemed that her burnt butt was going to be the least of her problems. Peri entered the room and immediately noticed Selena standing as still as a pole in the middle of the living room. The darkness of the room obscured her appearance to the mixed-haired cavalier, however.

“Hey! A burglar!” Peri said with disturbing levels of glee as she reached for her lance hanging on the wall, “Just what I wanted for Krismas!”

Selena took a large gulp and a few steps back towards the now dormant fireplace.

“This was a bad idea!” she yelled as she turned tail and hurried back up the chimney. She did not even think for a second about the severe amounts of pressure being placed on her back by the heaviness of the sack that she was carrying. It was better than becoming a Selena-cabob. Eventually, Selena managed to climb out of the chimney and take a breath.

“This is so not fair...” she says under her breath.

Selena sat down on the roof, pausing to make sure that Peri had not somehow followed her. She felt a sharp chill run up her body as her roasted rump touched the frozen white flakes. However, after a minute or so had passed, Selena heard the sound of an all-too familiar voice coming from behind. Sure enough, it was Anna.

“Nice work, Nerd!” she said, startling the ginger mercenary back onto her feet, “That’s one house down! Now you’ve only got about... four hundred and sixty-seven thousand and forty-two left. And that’s not even counting Hoshido.”

“Hold it right there!” roared the furious Selena, “You can walk! Why can’t YOU deliver them?!”

“Well, you see...” responded the mischievous merchant, “Me and my sisters have something called a “jolly bone” in our legs. Basically something that gives us the willpower to give stuff away for free during Krismas. Without it, we’re just as stingy as ever.”

“...You just made that up, didn’t you?” retaliated Selena, not buying anything that Anna is saying.

“Well, not ENTIRELY. The stingy part was true, though.” giggled Anna as she placed her hand on her hip, “But don’t worry! I’ve got faith in you, Nerd!”

Anna proceeded to hop backwards off of the building. Selena checked to make sure that she was okay (or perhaps to see if she had broken more than her “jolly bone” this time) but was surprised to see that Anna had completely vanished.

“How does she keep doing that...?” pondered the baffled mercenary. With that question in mind, Selena, now motivated by her sheer rage and anger, continued on her long journey.

Selena began to swiftly and stealthily enter each home, giving them presents and, as one would expect, also receiving several hundred additional scorches to the rear-end. She entered Effie’s house to give her an Elise figurine, Odin’s house to give him some enchanting beads, and numerous other homes. As for Hoshido, Selena moved twice as fast due to the excessive amount of homes that the majestic kingdom had compared to Nohr. By the end of it, Selena was exhausted and felt as if her legs were going to be reduced to ash at a moment’s notice.

“Finally... I’m...” Selena paused to release a pant, “Finished...”

It was rather miraculous. Somehow, she had succeeded in going to every single house in both Nohr and Hoshido and given them the gifts that they wanted. It would’ve almost been a generous act, had Selena not done it against her will. Selena sat done and awaited for when Anna would inevitably pop up one final time. Sure enough, Anna appeared right behind Selena.

“Huh. You actually did it. Nice work, Geek!” Anna cheered. Selena turned around and glared at the peppy merchant, rather smugly.

“You know it! ...Wait, you’re calling me a geek now?” Selena said, “What happened to “nerd”? Not like I miss that name or anything.”

“Well, I thought about it, and Geek only has THREE different letters to remember! So that’s gonna be your name from now on.” responded Anna with her usual teasing tone. “You can also consider it an upgrade for your job well done! I hope tonight taught you a lesson or two.”

“Yeah. Don’t trip random people on the streets for their toys.” Selena groaned.

“Well, seeing as the night’s almost done, I’ll be needed my sack.” Anna ordered as she held out her hand, signalling Selena to hand it over.

Selena stood up from her relaxed position and handed the sack back to Anna. However, just as the sack touched Anna’s fingers, something fell out of it that caused Selena to freeze up. It was the Corrin doll for Camilla, which she must have forgotten to deliver during her trek through Nohr.

“Huh?!” Selena said with a mixture of shock and panic brewing in her voice, “That... That’s Lady Camilla’s Corrin doll!”

“Hm.” pondered Anna, “Just when I was about to give you a pat on the head for your effort. Guess that means you’re not done just yet, Geek!” Anna hoisted her sack over her shoulder and turned away from the distraught Selena. Before departing, she gives her final few words to the mercenary.

“Don’t worry though. I’ve still got faith in you!” she said with confidence beaming from her lips, “...Not a whole lot of faith, but it’s still something. See ya next year, Geek!” With her parting words run dry, Anna walked away into the snowy darkness of the night.

Selena walked over to the snow-covered Corrin doll and picked it up, wiping off the flakey white remnants. There were about three hours remaining until morning. Would she be able to make it all the way to Castle Krakenburg within a matter of three hours?

“Ugh. I don’t really have a choice, do I?” moaned Selena as she stuffed the Corrin doll into her pocket and began her long journey back to the castle.

Three hours had passed. Selena had finally arrived at Castle Krakenburg by the skin of her neck and with the Corrin doll in one piece. She wasn’t Anna’s little helper this time, however. She was going to deliver this doll as herself, without the need for keeping it a secret. She figured that it would also pay off big time in the long run, which added to her motivation. Selena crept into Camilla’s quarters and immediately noticed the slumbering princess under the sheets. She tip-toed over to the bed and reached into her pocket quickly. With care, she pulled out the Corrin doll and placed it on the opposite side of Camilla’s head, with the doll’s tiny arm touching her flowing purple locks of hair. Selena smiled upon hearing the happy mid-rest moans of her master, but she made sure to write “From Selena” on the doll’s tag, just to be sure that she got the credit for the gift.

With everything said and done for the night, and the sun rising in the distance, Selena stepped towards the door and turned to Camilla.

“Merry Krismas, Lady Camilla.” said Selena just before stepping out of the room and closing the door silently. There was not a shred of malice or anger in her voice, or even any irritation. Perhaps this was because Selena had finally done what she had wanted to do all month. Or perhaps she was just happy to see that Camilla was sleeping softly, possibly even more so now that she finally had her doll. Either way, Selena felt satisfied with the end result of her Krismas troubles. It would certainly be a night that she would never forget (Even if she desperately wanted to).


End file.
